Friday, November 13, 2009

dialogue

Her relationship with her fiancé is sliding and she doesn’t understand why. They are both under more work stress these days but she tries to compensate for it by being super supportive. She always has something nice to say when he gets home. She compliments him regularly and tries to build him up. It hasn’t helped.

His relationship with his fiancé is slipping and he doesn’t understand why. Regularly he would leave work early so that he can prepare a nice dinner before she gets home. He would do loads of chores around the house, even the washing without her having to ask. It hasn’t helped.

They are both giving a lot of themselves, but they are not speaking the same language. Words are important to her, and thus she compliments him often. Deeds are important to him, so he does a lot for her. If she wants to speak his language, she should do something for him. Even if it doesn’t seem like a big thing for her, it’ll mean a lot for him. In the same way, he needs to give her more words of affection.

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There are more languages than just these two. Do you know what language you speak? Do you know what language your loved ones are speaking? Most importantly, can you speak their language?

16 comments:

  1. Reminds me of the book by Dr. Gary Chapman, The Five Love Languages. My husband is a works guy and I am a time gal so we do have to step out of what we like in order to give to the other a gift of love. :O)

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  2. i know we speak different languages and it freightens me sometimes that we may not have enough time to learn each other's lingo... you are a wise one, louis dear!

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  3. wisdom doesn't always come from books, it also comes via observation ... you are clearly a keen observer.

    warm smiles to you dear louis,

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  4. If I ever have a partner, I'm hope we're able to speak the same language. That is so important for success.

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  5. I was just thinking the other day that sometimes my husband and I might be speaking English to each other but we are speaking two different languages! Getting to that shared language is part of the "work" of people a couple and I think it comes with time.

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  6. Hey Louis, I read the book Diane mentioned years ago. It helped my hubby and I so much. And it helps in all relationships, not just spousal. Great story ... perfect illustration of when you don't communicate effectively, it's so easy to start drifting apart. Kudos to you and keep up the amazing work!

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  7. I think you and I both know that, nowadays, that seems to be the problem...

    Love,

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  8. This is fantastic and made me think...

    much love

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  9. Just because we love someone in a way they don't understand, doesn't mean that we don't love them with everything we have. Very true! Cute picture too! :)

    I left you an award on my blog! :)

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  10. Firstly I love the title of your blog! :) It is so true, I think that is what we all seek. Secondly what a profound post! And so true! Thank you for posting it! :)

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  11. I never realised how important this is in a relationship. I dont think I have purposely spoken someones love language, but I do think that we pick up on it and react towards it un-consciously. Imagine how much we are missing out on if we dont fully understand the others love language.

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  12. I just did this personality test thing with my work, called "disc" or "skid" or something with s c i d involved. Anyway, it was all about how we communicate in different ways and that the barrier can be really hard to overcome when you're trying to 'communicate' to someone who communicates in a different way to you. I don't know where I'm going with this but I guess it's important to be adaptable, especially if things are 'slipping'. I liked this entry a lot.

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  13. I love this. The last question is very thought provoking.

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  14. Ha! A fly on the wall..this is a 'picture' of our own love languages; the Machinist and I. I love the way you put this. So very true. In fact, I was talking with one of our daughters just yesterday about this very thing. Who would have thought I'd come across your blog today. xxx

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  15. I personally like a partner who can speak more than one language. I love words. And, I love when actions back those words up.

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  16. u definitely had something for me to think about there. :)

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