“Why did you do that?” he stares fiercely at her. She drops her head in shame. “I don’t know.” Slowly he shakes his head in disapproval. “That’s not good enough. I need to know why you did it.”As she stares at him her shame turns to contempt. “Because I wanted to. Because I felt like it. Who are you to tell me how to act?”He gets up and walks away. Just before he leaves he looks back: “I can’t tell you how to act, I just didn’t think you would do anything like that”
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We create personas in our minds of the people we know. When there’s disconnect between that persona and the actual person, we can hurt the ones we love. When someone acts different to what you expect of them, before you judge them, judge your persona of them. If the persona you created doesn’t reflect their true nature, change your vision of them to fit in with who they are instead of trying to change them to fit into your vision of who you think they are.
Where do I start...thank you for becoming a follower, first off. Secondly, you are an incredibly talented writer. Thanks so much for sharing your talent with the universe.
ReplyDeleteand thus starts the guilt. of trying to fit yourself into anothers opinion of you...
ReplyDeletei agree with Shadow.
ReplyDeleteif i change my persona about all the wrongful and offensive actions that a certain someone did...that will effect my trust for always for that person and possible others. it will change their character in my mind and my expections will be low for them...i hope that no one thinks of me that way if i do wrong just one single time.
ReplyDeletei think we have to forgive...and be weary...but not lower our standards for someone. Let them know that we expect more from them...because they are capable of it!
www.jemappelles-christa.com
so true. when did it become so difficult to appreciate people for who they are? to stop standing so close our vision gets blurred of what is there before us?
ReplyDeleteHello from the UK. Pleased to meet you. I hope you don't mind if I stick around; I have enjoyed reading your posts and would very much like to read more.
ReplyDeleteLOVE your writing Louis. You definitely have an unusual perspective for a guy. It's refreshing. And for that I applaud you. Keep up the great work. I look forward to your future writing.
ReplyDeleteUnless we are very, very careful, we doom each other by holding onto images of one another based on preconceptions that are in turn based on indifference to what is other than ourselves. This indifference can be, in its extreme, a form of murder and seems to me a rather common phenomenon. We claim autonomy for ourselves and forget that in so doing we can fall into the tyranny of defining other people as we would like them to be. By focusing on what we choose to acknowledge in them, we impose an insidious control on them. I notice that I have to pay careful attention in order to listen to others with an openness that allows them to be as they are, or as they think themselves to be. The shutters of my mind habitually flip open and click shut, and these little snaps form into patterns I arrange for myself. The opposite of this inattention is love, is the honoring of others in a way that grants them the grace of their own autonomy and allows mutual discovery.”
ReplyDelete- Anne Truitt
I love this post. x
Very well put.
ReplyDeleteI agree. A lot of the time, there's something going on in us that needs to be addressed before we point the finger at others. :O)
ReplyDeleteThe flip side to this is, sometimes we see what we want to see in others to the point that we close our eyes to who they really are to our own detriment. For instance, have you ever stayed in a relationship with a person who disappointed you repeatedly, but you "just knew" that what you were seeing wasn't who they REALLY were? Until you realized, it was. You made them who you wanted them to be all along.
ReplyDeleteJust something to think about.
Great post!!
Thank you for following me.
ReplyDeleteI have this almost morbid intrest in who people really are underneath the acts, the masks and all the illusions. I loved this post.
melissa
Louis, I have something for you at my blog.
ReplyDeletewise words x
ReplyDelete